The Tweets I Didn’t Send [2020 Edition]
This post contains a lot of opinions, a sprinkling of sarcasm, and some serious bitchiness ~ it’s time for the Tweets I didn’t send 2020 edition …
Read More7+ years of my life in very graphic detail. Dating | sex | mental health | life blog. Frequently #NSFW 18+
This post contains a lot of opinions, a sprinkling of sarcasm, and some serious bitchiness ~ it’s time for the Tweets I didn’t send 2020 edition …
Read MoreI came across something on Twitter, started tapping out a note so I could tweet about it later, and then couldn’t stop tapping … so I did the sensible thing and turned it into a blog post! Source: this tweet from @aquabeings I was bullied because … ▪️ I got an A in my exam. ▪️ I got a C in my exam. ▪️ I didn’t have a Morgan De Toi schoolbag. ▪️ I did have a “lame” Walkers Ready Salted rucksack that my mum and dad got free with a 32-box. ▪️ I…
Read MoreI have a question: If my boyfriend is that disinterested in sex that we’re not having any of it [again], how come I keep waking up in the middle of the night with his hands down my pants? Last night, for example. This morning, actually. 4:38 am, according to the clock. I found myself risen from my slumber, still in the dark, roused by something that was nice and annoying all at once. It took me a few moments to work out what it was: Bear’s hands. Bear’s hands rubbing…
Read MoreLet’s talk about bees. The black and yellow fuzzy kind. The ones that are lovely and need to be protected at all costs and definitely not killed because there will be no coffee and chocolate without them. (Or so I read.) – ??? – I’m deathly afraid of bees. And wasps. And anything that looks remotely like it could be a bee or a wasp. (I panic about regular flies an embarrassing amount.) I’ve jumped off balconies to get away from bees and wasps, ran into walls trying to flee…
Read MoreIt’s been quite a long time since I last got my hands on a new toy to play with, so I was literally hopping up and down with excitement when I learned that I’d won Little Switch Bitch’s Twitter contest and the lovely looking Iroha Rin was on its way to me. I waited in on delivery day, tracked the van at every step of its journey, and was practically at the front door before the chap even had a chance to ring the doorbell. “Blimey, love. Were you waiting…
Read MoreSpoon me, please. Throw your arms around me, draw me in close, and let my ass nestle into that space beneath your stomach where it fits so perfectly and snugly. I’ll do that little butt nudge you like. You know the one: a tiny little sign that’s barely a sign at all, subtle enough to almost miss but obvious enough to let you know exactly what’s on my mind. I’ll drop the nudge in casually like I’m stretching or positioning myself into your hug, but I’m really making sure your…
Read MoreI recently delved into my drafts on Twitter for the first time in a very long time (like, forever) and found some absolute crackers that I thought I might share with you before I delete them. These were things I didn’t feel brave enough to say, changed my mind about saying, couldn’t say because of shitty signal (I’m assuming), and various other unknown reasons. I know it says 2019 in the title, but there’s a good chance that some of these have been sat there for a good few years. …
Read MoreI tried to talk to Bear six times yesterday. He was at home all day because his work stuff is starting to go quiet. I spent most of the day sat at my desk, tap-tap-tapping away, earning that dollar (working from home), but I took a few minutes here and there to make a drink, say hello to him, make sure he was okay, so-on and so forth. We’ve had issues with the teen recently … and I mean serious issues. It’s been pretty hellish, to be honest, and there…
Read More“Get down on the ground!” I watched him fall to the floor, not quite knowing what to do. There was a lot of commotion around me, but the alarm hadn’t gone off yet. That was usually the first thing to alert us to the danger — loud, repetitive, and every bit as frightening as the event it was used to signify. “Get down on the ground!” he shouted at me again. I still had the strange, whistling sound we’d just heard in my head, replaying over and over and drowning…
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